What I am learning about myself these days...

It's Thursday afternoon - the sun is starting to dip low in the sky, casting a warm golden glow through my window. I find myself sitting at my desk, fingers tapping away on the keyboard as I let my thoughts flow freely. I'll go back and refine my words later, but for now, I'm just letting my thoughts pour out onto the screen.

I wouldn't have believed it, if someone had told me last year that I would be actively participating in a huge ministry dedicated to supporting and empowering other women. "No, not me, God. I can't do that!" 

When really, I was saying:

God, I don't trust you

God, I won't do that

God, I know better than you

I realize now that I have been closing myself off to my own spiritual development. I have always been cautious and reluctant to step out of my comfort zone and place my complete trust in the Lord. But God has known me from the very beginning and has been intricately involved in forming and shaping me, until my time. 

Earlier this year and part of last year, I sensed a stirring within me that propelled me to make some changes, although I couldn't fully comprehend it at the time. I closed one blog and started a new blog from scratch - I knew I might lose some followers. We also made the decision to leave a church that didn't have a strong focus on supporting Israel and the Jewish people. Eventually, I found a new church that welcomed us, and I felt at home there. I got involved in a 9-week course on Jewish ministry and was later invited to join the Tikfah team. Tikfah, (which means "Hope" in Hebrew) is a ministry that organizes volunteers to serve and support the Jewish community within our area. It's been a rewarding experience being a part of this team. There are only a handful in my area. And then BSF. 

source: freedesignfile - starder

I am learning that I should never confine myself to a narrow Christian mindset. I need to break out of my comfort zone and be open to new experiences and opportunities to do God's work. I shouldn't limit myself to ministering just to my family, as that can be a way of avoiding broader responsibilities. Instead, I need to fully trust in God's plan and take those bold, uncomfortable steps forward, knowing that He will support me. (and He has) 

It's essential for me to always examine my level of trust in God and my love for people.

There is a hurting world out there - if not us, then who?